Wednesday, January 13, 2010

Hump Day Smiles

A few thoughts to make you smile...

Birds of a feather flock together and crap on your car.

When I'm feeling down, I like to whistle. It makes the neighbor's dog run to the end of his chain and gag himself.

The older you get, the tougher it is to lose weight, because by then your body and your fat have gotten to be really good friends.

The easiest way to find something lost around the house is to buy a replacement.

Did you ever notice: The Roman Numerals for forty (40) are "XL."

The sole purpose of a child's middle name is so he can tell when he's really in trouble.

There's always a lot to be thankful for if you take time to look for it. For example, I am sitting here thinking how nice it is that wrinkles don't hurt.

Did you ever notice: When you put the 2 words 'The' and 'IRS' together it spells "Theirs."

The older we get, the fewer things seem worth waiting in line for.

Some people try to turn back their odometers. Not me, I want people to know "why" I look this way.

I've traveled a long way and some of the roads weren't paved.

When you are dissatisfied and would like to go back to youth, think of Algebra.

Long ago when men cursed and beat the ground with sticks, it was called witchcraft.
Today, it's called golf.

3 comments:

Janet said...

Since my husband's an avid golfer, I loved the last one! But they're all great - a perfect way to start Hump Day. Hope you have a great one :)

Liza said...

Thanks for the laugh Alannah! I had seen a few of these, but not all. Happy Hump Day everyone!

Silver James said...

LOL! Loved these. Thanks for the great start to the rest of the week. :D